Sweet Sorrow

Thus far, my goodbyes have been fairly painless. My friends are certainly near and dear to my heart- my pillars of strength, support, and laughter, but I've been able to manage my tears quite well. I've been biting my lip, giving hearty hugs and a few high fives- no tears! I thought I was just a brave, brave soul....yeah, I was wrong.

Apparently, I've been rationing out tiny portions of emotions only to find that there was actually a reservoir in waiting. It just so happens that my adventurous parents had planned an elaborate trip to Canada with friends. It just so happens that they had concocted this plan long before Europe was more than a dream, and therefore, they left four days in advance to my departure.

"No big deal", I thought. I'll probably enjoy the alone time; I mean, I'd heard my dad's ill-timed jokes multiple times. My ever-maternal mom had left a lengthy and detailed to-do list that even included "get to airport to fly to Dublin" in huge font.

Thanks, Mom.

I anticipated that I'd be somewhat relieved to say goodbye....wrong again.

I dropped them off early this morning and low and behold, my grief poured over like a waterfall. I have been a blubbering mess since 7 am this morning. I cried sorting the mail, walking the dogs, and checking my e-mail. What's come over me? I sincerely love my parents, but my God, I've lived apart from them for nearly ten years.

I turned to a dear old friend for comfort- a faithful companion that has never let me down.

Bunny Tracks ice cream. I'm recovering nicely.

My only theory is that this was simply the pent up goodbyes that have been hiding behind my courageous facade.

So Kelly, Ellie, Caris, Shelley, Jeff, Kerry, Sara, Rhetta, Alex, Kristin, Kelsey, and more- a few of those tears were for you. I'll miss you much.